What you’ve read so far is the prelude to actually communicating about tough topics with more clarity and purpose. If you haven’t read the first 10, head back to Tip #1 on this Substack and get caught up. In brief, here’s what we’ve covered already:
Tip #1 - be brave and decide to have the difficult conversation.
Tip #2 - communicate to solve the problem.
Tip #3 - say as much as you can upfront and get it behind you.
Tip #4 - don't say everything! Leave out the unhelpful bits.
Tip #5 - use words we all understand. Be inclusive.
Tip #6 - people will make up their own facts if you don’t start talking. Get in the fray.
Tip #7 - think of the “evergreen” questions people will ask. Start there.
Tip #8 - give your “dreaded question” some thought too. That builds confidence.
Tip #9 - it won’t be perfect but folks are likely to cut you slack if you try to fix it.
Tip #10 - you must have a plan because it’s not just a conversation.
Tip #11 gets us into the basics of messaging. We already have some ideas about what we can and should say, what people are likely to ask, and what we should leave out. But did you know that you can over communicate?
Too much of a good thing is more than most people can handle. You want them to remember the salient information you’re sharing so you can solve the problem, put it behind you and restore trust. Keep it simple and strategic.
As a media trainer I have taught people the Rule of Three for a couple of decades. Here it is.
The Rule of Three is based on research which shows that people can recall three things from their short-term memory. That’s why it’s best to communicate three main messages.
The neurochemical reason: if you want something to stick in someone’s brain like a catchy commercial jingle, use a sequence of three. For example, “By Mennen” - three syllables about men’s after-shave lotion that have stuck in our brains since the 80s.
The scientific reason: three is the smallest number of elements you can combine to create a pattern. Whoa, that’s cool.
The Old Testament reason: “A strand of three cords is not easily broken.”- Ecclesiastes 4:12 Put simply, one isn’t quite enough, two is better, but three is stronger.
Focus on the three messages that you’ve identified as most important and use them to respond. Restate and repeat as many times as you need to in order to make your point.
In fact, repeating helps people recall your response and even better, reconfirms that what you’re saying is the essential truth they need to take away from the conversation. Use different words to restate your point, but feel free to go over the same ground you’ve already covered.
If it’s truly important, it’s important enough to say again.
Here’s how to decide which messages to use;
1) Do the messages help us solve the problem we identified?
2) Do the messages cover the topic so well that we won’t have to revisit it to share more?
3) Do the messages make the point without adding an unnecessary, distracting element?
4) Do the messages speak to people using words they understand?
5) Do the messages answer the questions we know people will ask?
Great! You’re on the right track, but my guess is that you have way more than three messages to work with.
Next, carefully evaluate which of the messages you’ve come up with that will get you to the goal line of solving the problem, getting the issue behind you and restoring trust. Aim for three. Use each word strategically and be sure you’re saying what you mean, and meaning what you say.
You will use those three messages as the basis of your communication. You’ll repeat or restate them as needed. They are your go-to responses. They are what you want people to remember from the conversation, speech, interview, etc.
Remember, if your audience can only call up three things - four max - from their short term memory, make sure they are the most important messages you want to convey. If you over-communicate then the three things they remember might not be the strategic messages that are most helpful.
The other, less important messages can still be used as supporting details in the conversation if you need them. But make sure to state, restate, and restate again your go-to-responses.
This is where your team will be really helpful. Workshop your messages with a test audience of your colleagues, family, neighbors or whomever you think will give you the best read.
And of course, if the issue is happening at work, be sure to consult your PR pros and legal team for their support and help.
Stay tuned for more!
Click here to advance to Tip #12 - use real words that have meaning. Don’t talk at the issue to appear to be solving the problem. Use meaningful words that address it.
Thank you!